I was reading Bill Hybes' "Courageous leadership". I am enthralled by this book. It really teaches us about godly leadership. Without vision, men perish. When men has vision but has no courage or faith to act it out, it is simply a "tragic" (What Bill Hybes wrote). Take away vision from a leader and you cut his heart because vision is the core of leadership. I could sense that kind of conviction, defiance and firmness when i was reading the book.
I used to think that leadership in the church level is only about serving. In the bible, it clearly stated that whoever wants to be the first must be the last. It also shows us how Jesus washes the disciples' feet. He serves men even though He is God. It is good to serve the people as a leader. However, leadership is not at it's strongest when it is driven without a vision. Something that you are leading your people towards. I take some time to reflect on what i have learned from this book. I wonder what is it i want to see in the campus.
I believe this is God's vision. I made it mine as well.
2 Peter 3:9
The Lord isn’t really being slow about his promise, as some people think. No, he is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent.
I believe in this. What is a church for if there is no one who outreach? Did Jesus come and die for people who are "born christians". It hurts me to see believers entangled in their own problems, struggles in life and much attitude problems when they have God to rely on. Non believers out there are perishing entangled in their past experience, family background, unfortunate encounters and a world without love. The sad thing is that they have no one to depend on at all.
When i say this, i don't mean i am perfect. I can't love people 100%. I still have my own shortcomings. However, i want to share as much as i can. I don't share when people can't see the light in me. If i do, they might end up having more bad experiences. As i am growing, i want to share to those who have already witnessed a change in me. It may not bring results immediately. However, i will like to give my best and try.
Whenever i think of the campus, my vision is to reach out to the poor people, the outcast of the society, people who have problematic family, loners who have been hurt back and forth by their classmates' remark, men who contemplate suicide as the only way in life. However, i know that this is not the time now. We need a strong team to be able to help these people experience Jesus. We need good seeds to reach out and take care of these poor souls. If people from these groups of people come without strong team players, they wouldn't grow but end up having more problems. It is important to have them but good seeds are really needed as well.
God, bring a revival to NYP! It starts with the believers.
2 Chronicles 7:14
if My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land.
Behind the numbers, it is the soul. Behind the conversion, it is the birth of joy.
24However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.
Do it! John Jeremiah!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
grateful - Music:"You're Faithful" by Hillsongs
I just passed 21. So damn sad to enter adulthood. I am thinking that i just can't be young forever. Age is catching up.
It is cool to spend time with some people who have moved on. Jia Hui, Ken, Leslie and more who have attended my birthday celebration. It is indeed a great time to catch up with one another. I can't imagine i am still here to serve God, i am thinking God has a different plan for each one of us. How long will i stay in polydins? For this matter, it is still unknown. God will decide. I am leaving this to Him.
I am also enlisting soon. No question or doubt that there is certain level of fear mixed with a keen anticipation of seeing what is to come. I am just thinking if i will grow or snap. If others can go through it, i pray that i would be able to as well. Army life... if that is what i have to go through, i would go through it no matter what.
Thank God for 2 brothers who cross the line of faith last week! It is amazing! Welcome Alex and Shanlin into the kingdom of God! He is great, fabulous and awesome! It is such a great testimony. Let me briefly go through it.
Firstly, we pray that there is no rain after 6pm.
Indeed, it didn't rain, It rains so heavily before 6pm.
Secondly, we pray that none will use the tennis court at north canteen.
A damn risky one! It is because people generally use the tennis court at north canteen to practise on friday night. However, God delivers! Praise God.
Situations happen that day. One contact dislocates his arm. Fear grips me, but i have to handle the situation wisely. By the grace of God, he can still walk. In the end, we send him back to his parents because that is the right thing to do.
It don't stop God from moving. After the dodge ball ended, one of my contact asks Stanley who saw Wei Koon bible on the table. Then he starts to question, "why do we read the bible?". Shocked by the question, we took this opportunity to share Christ. It draws the attention of another contact called Alex. I accompanied it with life testimony and how God bless us for this dodge ball that day. Alex then exclaimed, "it is really a miracle, who can do it beside God?". He said it because recently rain is rampant and all NYPians know that many would use North canteen's tennis court. However, on that day itself, not a single soul stepped in. He receives Jesus! Praise God!
Shanlin visited service the next day. Despite going for so many services in other churches, God plans for him to receive Jesus in Hope! There must be a specific plan awaiting for him.
Credits all go to Jesus!
I want to take this opportunity to affirm Keng Ping and Xiao Yuan who have invited their friends. Keng Ping has grown to be someone who is faithful with doing small little things to someone who dares to take up challenges. Especially after today when i spoke to him about being a shepherd, instead of avoiding like how he usually did, he responded to it. Connecting Alan and making him feel comfortable by getting him a drink. I am very encouraged how he has helped so many people in tutoring them even though he don't earn money for it, doing much community service yet still remain so faithful to God. Scoring well for exams (he has GPA 3.8+ for goodness sake!) having good time management, sustaining healthy lifestyle yet not compromising any church service, caregroup meeting, sowing events. He has so much joy in difficult situations, i have never seen him frown before. I forsee that he will do so much more in the long run!
Xiao Yuan is someone who serves to his utmost abilities, always having the servanthood spirit in almost everything that he does! He does his best in connecting his friends, making known the gospel to those who are around him. Being a believer of just 4 months, he has brought 3 friends to cross the line of faith! It ranges from survey contact to classmates to best friend! Who could have done it except God? He recognizes the value of serving, always giving his best in everything that is given to him. He is a good testimony at home and exuberates joy in seeing people crossing the line of faith! Wow! Great potential! He too like Keng Ping has done extremely well for his exam yet not compromising any caregroup meeting, church service and sowing events.
Just want to end off these affirmation to the both of you by saying that both of you are so greatly appreciated! God is going to use both of you so much more when you recognise that you're not just doing it alone, but doing it with God! You are all so faithful in doing small little things from writing the lyrics to leading games to holy communion. I am so darn sure that God has so much more exciting things awaiting all of you! Retain your new believers well. Sow joy, love, hope and impart faith to them! You guys are greater, but Jesus who is living in you is greater and will do so much greater things through both of you! Jia you!
To the rest - Harvest has not ended, it is just the beginning! Let's ride on the momentum and glorify God by bringing the lost souls back to Him!
- Location:Home
- Mood:
hyper - Music:Let Everything That Has Breath - Hillsongs
Tied down by extreme sadness when i was reading a blog. A man who holds leadership position who didn't want to die to himself, leading the church when he is barely surviving, insisting that he is teaching the right things. All these are simply just a waste of time in the kingdom of God. I sincerely pray that he will come to repentance and i believe he can be a great leader that i respect again.
No man are above temptation. I was wondering to myself many times about this statement. It is frequently used especially after the turmoils few months back, it wasn't really emphasized before the incident. It gets me very analytical about situations.
"Why do people only mention some biblical principles when things have already happened?"
I remembered Leslie's words at the moment, "we got to teach the word of God in balance". Don't teach after we know they are facing the situations, always teach the Word of God in balance all the time. For instance, many would like to bring up about testing when certain crisis happens in someone's life when it should be constantly being emphasized because we never know when God is going to test someone!
Ok. I am going to even point out something that is even more tangible. Harvest period is the time when people will like to teach about evangelism! Lol. I heard someone asking me, "what are your plans for your group for evangelism, especially it is the season to reap." I simply answered, "I don't have any plan for evangelism because it should be all year round. Unless you're talking about plans for setting the momentum right for a GREATER harvest. Then yes, i do have plans for it".
Majority of believers today are stuck in seeing personal converts during seasons like Christmas. People crossing the line of faith have slowly become gifts from God during Christmas. Yes, i am happy for these people crossing the line of faith during this period of time. I don't condemn. However, believers have got to open their eyes wide, and listen carefully to what the word of God has to say.
John 4:35
Do you not say, 'Four months more and then the harvest'? I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for harvest.
When we walk with God, we will testify about His goodness, be it during Christmas or out of it. Obviously, these seasons should have more people visiting services because it seems reasonable for non believers to come during this season. By saying all these, i am not downplaying every christian because i believe from the deepest corner of my heart that there are still plenty today who sow extensively in season and out of it. I am just commenting on what most are doing nowadays.
Coming back to the topic about the word of God. Like what i've mentioned earlier, we should teach it in balance all year round. It can definitely be reminders for us when situations arise, but it can come by shocking to many when they just heard it for the first time caught up in their problems and sins.
On sunday, we met up Andrew for follow up. It is the first time Suherman taught a lesson. Thumbs up for him! He is a very inferior guy who think he can't do much, but he do taught well in a way that it is comprehensive. It was a great first time! He is a faithful man, who consistenly makes efforts to walk right with God. I can also see Andrew writting it down dilligently even though it is just the fundamentals. Haha. New believers love the basics. I want to go back to the basic too!
That is all folks. Good afternoon!
- Location:NTU Graduate Studies Office
- Mood:
contemplative
What is the definition of being complicated?
Definition
difficult to analyze, understand, explain, etc.: a complicated problem.
(Taken from dictionary.com)
Men are so complicated. It has come to a point that it is so difficult to fathom what is around us.
Men are born to scheme, plot, tell lies, manipulate etc. Betrayal, false loyalty can take place because there is a greed for power, money and authority. I am looking around my workplace, trying to see if i can see any hints of goodness here. Everyone looks nice, they smile, they talk to you and all the rest without any implication of harm. Underneath the smile, it is piercing daggers and venomous thoughts.
Many people can say, "it is not that bad to work over here, you have permission to use the facebook, computer, it is considered "freedom". To a good extent, some even have a good laugh in conversations. Who would have guessed that as unglamorous as administration position can be, people would still want to be someone of higher authority. Who could have known that even a campus that do not deal with monetary issues will have this kind of conflict? It puzzles me as well.
A few days ago, my manager spoke to me about gullibility in this industry. This sentence captures my attention, "Behind their back, they have eyes. Behind your back, no one can stop them from talking". Imagine if i were to work in banks today, i would have been slaughtered ALIVE! Gone are the days of working in company like AGI, UniGlobal. People over there have been sincere, telling your mistakes straight to the face, allowing grace to sip in if you don't take it for granted. Over here, departments are having underground competition. I am wondering, "if you are handling different aspects of administration, what is there to compete about? Where is the teamwork?". "Team" is not a word recognised in this office, as much as they emphasize the importance, they are just doing for individual benefits. Manager doing it for benefits of departments, workers doing it for benefits of oneself. Everyone wants to get their superior favor.
I am just working here for one month, yet so much is ongoing that you have to realize that all eyes are flitting around, they are like travelling spotlight, turning on when you did something you are not supposed to, bringing your mistake into limelight. I thank God i have the opportunity to blog, and i sat right behind where people don't come that often to the back. Thus, i am able to blog. I need to do it with much awareness. However, i am fearless. All they can do is to terminate me.. Lol. I am not a permanent staff anywhere and there is no power struggle within me.
Corporate industry is real. It is not stress/amount of work we are talking about. My manager told me to learn now, it is still not too late because i am still young. I thank God the church is great! People of the church, even when they force their smile, it is not for themselves but to lighten the spirit of others. Over here, people smile to disarm another. I used to think in the past i am aware of these. All of us can say we face politics in our project. Yes, we are aware, we know. But, the real ball game is when you are a permanent staff in the office, that is when SURVIVOR game will all begin.
I CAN SHARE ESPECIALLY TO STUDENTS, IT IS A WHOLE DIFFERENT BALL GAME! IF YOU THINK YOU ARE SMART ENOUGH, HUMBLE YOURSELF AND THINK TWICE.
That is all!
- Location:NTU
- Mood:
apathetic
Pain jolted me at every possible instance when i rest my feet on the ground. It seems that an unseen force is working something unusual on the bones of my feet. I wonder if i should spend some money to see a doctor, which i totally don't see any purpose for it at all.
God is always good. He has showered me with blessings throughout my life and it is definitely a pleasure to serve Him! God has an awesome plan for each one of us.
- Location:NTU Graduate Student Office
- Mood:
exhausted
As usual, beyond the realm of conscience is a "must watch" for me. I was watching it yesterday night after feeding a sheep. I really think that the story is picking up really fast. I can sense that Tavia Yeung, driven by all her ambitions and desires, she will soon become the most hated villian on the show. I am still amazed by Susan Tse's creepy laughter, she is just so "genuine" in an evil role, not to mention her brilliant delivery back in "Rosy Business". Michelle Yim and Susanna Kwan are as usual amazing, i am going to watch to the end for sure, at least i hope so. I thank God that it will hit the finale before i go into army!
I am currently sharing Christ to a friend, never shared before. It is my first time, i need to break the spiritual ice. Off i go, God bless me! God, gives me the knowledge, wisdom, love whatever You deem fit. Give him a responsive heart! God, all credits go back to You! Bye
- Location:NTU Graduate Studies Office
- Mood:
cranky
While i was on the bus to NTU today, i learnt something invaluable.
I had to reach at 8.30 for work. Everyday, i am on the dot. five minutes earlier, or five minutes late. I will usually take the bus at pioneer MRT station on 8.15, it will be just ample time for me to get to my workplace punctually. It just happened that last friday, i was late three minutes for work due to the many red traffic that anyone out there would have hated it, just like me. I was reminded to be punctual, not reprimanded because it don't matter for a temporary staff like me, but my supervisor would like to cultivate a good habit on me before the examination comes on november, and you can't be late during examination period because students can't afford to wait!
Traffic wasn't that smooth as well today. While i was watching the digital clock increasing it's minutes all the time, my heart was increaing with panic as well. Deep inside my heart, i felt like cursing those people who are crossing the road "last minute". Instantly, a thought flashed in my mind, what if i was a pedestrian rushing for time, crossing the road last minute as well? I took me a while to ponder.
So true, if i have been the pedestrian, i would've sworn to declare my rights to cross the road, be it last minute or what. Why do i need to bother about others who are late for classes or work inside the bus? It brings me this word, "selflessness". At that point of time, i found it so hard to practise it, especially when situations are not favourable to you.
Love your neighbors as yourself
Everybody and anybody is our neighbor. When i say i love, do i love generally or individually? It reminds me of what Pastor Jeff mentioned yesterday during the membership class, it is so easy to say to a big crowd of people and say "I Love all of you", yet behind this phrase, no act of love is involved at all. For instance, think back how many pop stars told you that he/she loves you in the concert, but behind it, they didn't even talk to you personally before and they have records of falling out with people around them etc. I don't think they can love us as themselves. It gets me wondering what is the "love" God mentions in the bible.
Imagine myself dying for the person who cross the road, obstructing me to get to my workplace on time. It would be insane. But i could dare to proclaim, one man who did it, and He is none other than Jesus.
He died for the unworthy, the people who foil his plan for preaching the word, oppress the poor etc. He is the selfless love that God is talking about!
1 Corinthians 13:5
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
1 John 4:10
This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.
I want to start loving!
- Location:NTU
- Mood: loved
- Music:"How Great is our God" by Chris Tomlin
2 days ago, one of the most exciting drama of all times just aired in Hong Kong. I am so fortunate to be able to watch in yesterday morning. It just shows an important point, people are getting faster to get the drama uploaded to the internet right now. I applaud them for their service, if it wasn't for them, i wouldn't be able to catch such an interesting drama.
Talking about the drama, beyond the realm of conscience talks about the scheming acts in the palace. Somehow, it is not a very educational show as it revolves around grudges, hate, bitterness, vengeance etc. The controllers of the decoration, food, embroidery and jewellery come together to pit against one another outwardly or inwardly so that they can become the leader of all the palace maids. Living life in a palace is certainly tough for the women as you can't differentiate the good from the bad.
It is sort of a mixture of war and beauty with jewel in the palace. One girl named Lau Sam Ho acted by Charmaine Sheh chooses to uphold the good values her mother taught her in the midst of all the battles that are going on. On the other hand, Yu Gam Ling acted by Tavia Yeung is sucked into it and got worse each day as she deemed that the only way to survive in the palace is to be even more scheming than the rest. Sam Ho and Gam Ling were best friends before this relationship fall apart due to the differences in values and how they perceive life in the palace. They become the worst of enemies due to a internal power struggle for the emperor's favor, especially it didn't take much for Sam Ho to win the latter's heart. This greatly embittered Gam Ling who has worked so hard to climb the ladder to the "empress" position that she is holding towards the end.
Drama mama. Are we Sam Ho or Gam Ling when we live our life?
We can't exactly blame Gam Ling for her acts because it can be considered "justified" especially when situations around you are definitely not easy. Many a times in our life, we are like Gam Ling, who chose to be sucked into the world, going for authority, success, power and comfort. Probably we don't scheme, we don't manipulate the way she does to get what we want. Having said that, we use situations as an excuse to play around with God's word a little to please our sinful nature. Upholding values in our life like Sam Ho can be pretty hard, but it is what that reveals who our true self is.
Situations are placed around us to reveal our character, not to build them. Character is built in our daily life, values are changed when we read the word of God, spend devotional time with Him faithfully.
Christmas is coming up. It is so exciting because new campaign is up!
Alpha Tribe -> [Survivor 45]
It is gonna be so great because we are out in 4 areas!
OUTPLAY -> Enjoy each other presence, company and fellowship!
Psalm 55:13-14
13 But it is you, a man like myself,
my companion, my close friend,
14 with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship
as we walked with the throng at the house of God.
OUTLAST -> To see ourselves at the end goal
1 Corinthian 9:25B
but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.
OUTREACH -> Reach out to the lost, sheep without shepherd
Matthew 9:38
38Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field."
OUTGROW -> Grow in our personal life, character and to be more and more Christ liked everyday
Ephesian 4:15
Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ.
We want to have 2 Cs.
CHARACTER & COMPETENCE
Psalm 78:72
And David shepherded them with integrity of heart; with skillful hands he led them.
Last lap! Jiayou!
- Location:NTU Graduate Student Office
- Mood: contemplative
I am waiting, just waiting.
Waiting for? What is so worth waiting for in the month of october?
School reopens?
Sorry, i have left nyp.
Bittersweet?
Oh. I felt so guilty for not anticipating it as much. >.< (Honest reply, don't kill me for it)
God to move?
He moves everyday. Waiting every single day even if it isn't october.
Thus, I am waiting for BEYOND THE REALM OF CONSCIENCE!
And
WATER BAPTISM!
Firstly, congratulations to all who are getting water baptized, namely Wei Kang, Xiao Yuan and Frank! It is such a privilege to proclaim to the world that you are a Christ follower!
Going lunch. Tata
- Location:NTU
- Mood: lethargic
I am so bored right now!
Working in NTU student service center is interesting. My job scope is to entertain any student that comes around for enquiries. Only 1 student comes by each hour, and they usually don't stay for more than 5 minutes.
So, what happens right now is that i am earning $5.70 per hour just using facebook, reading blog, reading Rick Warren articles, planning DMM, slacking around, not doing work related stuffs. As much as i find certain things interesting in the things that i am reading, there is no accomplishment in work at all. The toughest work i have done today is to photocopy 3 items -> a new passport, an old passport and a matriculation card. I hope you understand my boredom by now.
I was reading through Rick Warren's ministry toolbox. As much as i want to post everything on here. It would be better if you can read it on his website at http://www.pastors.com/blogs/ministrytoo
Back to reading. See you tomorrow!
- Location:NTU student service center
- Mood: bored
- Music:"You're so vain" by Carly Simon
Lol. Tomorrow is leadership camp, and i am still not sleeping yet. Aim to turn in at 4am no matter what. Quite excited to see what is going to happen for the next 3 days.
Year 2007 brings me so many memories. As i was looking at the photos of the mission trip back then, a lot of flashback were brought to me. It was the year that i was at my worst, yet that was the time that i grew the most, and i would never forget the moments. The heartbreaks i caused, the setbacks i experienced, the tears i shed, the investments wasted, and the desire to move on. I remember so clearly up to now.
I have to give many props to the people who stood by me, helped me so much during this year of toughness. I would never have gotten by without their help. How they had comforted me (good or bad) ways, how they have counseled me, reminded me of their everlasting friendship. I say God is gracious up even though i have grieved Him much.
Firstly, thanks to accomplice Evangeline who i spent most of the time with during this year. Wakaka. We are on the boat of silent rebels during the year. All we thought of is moving on to the adults group at that time, which never come to pass until now. Even though our friendship is unbiblical during that year, it helped us in understanding one another better, and last year, we inspired one another to grow! Haha. Amazing fact is that we finally stopped being the silent rebels, and become more prayerful. Good kaki! Jiayou in your life science pioneering!
Xing Xing is my buddy since 2006. I treasured the friendship that i had with him. When he moved on in early 2007, i wanted to move on as well. It seems like i have lost a friend who can connect to me very well. Our relationship isn't that biblical, called to even "break up" because he isn't helping me. Whenever i was bored, i always called him to join in the dinner after service with my caregroup. And i would always talk to him, chat with him from nothing to all things. He isn't someone who help me much in my spiritual walk. But being with him let me truly understand what is it liked to be "myself" in that year. We have many ups and downs, but i always know he is someone i could always ask him out for, and i know in the deepest recess of my heart, he will be faithful to it. Thanks man, brother! Read the word of God more.
I really give my total respect for this person. She tolerates all the nonsense, met me up in all kinds of hours. Morning, afternoon, night. Trusted in me, sacrificed so much just to meet my needs. In that year, i can say i don't really appreciate her. To me she is just another leader who lives in her own world, what we called the "lala" land. When she told me that my group would hit 20 if i believe, i simply reply her with this word "impossible". I made it very clearly during one of my meeting, "You don't have to disciple me to be a UL, i will definitely move on to adults". I have to take back my words now, i guess. Haha. Her love for her people touched my heart, especially during last year leadership conference at KL, when she teared. God gave me the slap. I have done her much wrong, which i sincerely repented. Thanks Hui Mei, you've been a great influence in my life! Jia you in your leading the science group and your relationship with Daniel! God is going to bless you much!
Wow. God has done so much!
Short thanksgiving to some people....
Li Yan - Thanks for being a good shepherd and someone who always provide me with practicality in my ministry. I have really learnt a lot from you! You helped me to see possibilities and enable me to grow so much in being positive and seeing the potential in people. Despite my many shortcomings, you're so patient and gracious.
Jasmine - The faithful reader of my blog! Lol! You never fail to motivate me. Your speech always have a punch line! Thanks for always taking aside time to speak to me. Though little, i appreciate the efforts. :D
Wei Koon - Thanks for being a very supportive sheep all these while! Your simple faith in God really touches me and encourages me to persevere in walking with Jesus. You're someone who is teachable and faithful! It is funny to see how you responded in certain areas that i challenge you. I encourage you to continue to lead your caregroup into another level! God don't use the most talented person, but someone who desires to be used by Him. Jia you!
Wei Kang - Thanks for being another supportive sheep all these while. You're teachable and willing to obey. Despite being the obedient sheep that everyone knows, you will question to learn instead of challenging the authority. You have the "Go Extra Mile" spirit and despite being a new leader, you constantly pick up new skills, try new things. Many times, when i challenge you out of your comfort zone, you will listen and obey even though you don't know why all the times. God will bless you so much more! Jiayou!
I understand my careleaders are not the best, not the most ready, not the most skillful, still struggle in many areas. I have this trust in the both of you. You guys are new, yet being so faithful, so responsible and always going an extra mile! I am so proud of the both of you! The next generation lie in your hands. My "wei" family have to endure! Hardships will certainly come but i know by the hands of God, you will be safe and protected! Lead the guys into a greater breakthrough!
Thanks to God for everything! You're the Alpha & Omega. None of this would have happened without You. This group of friends i will never forget no matter what. So many more to affirm, i may not have written it, forgive me for missing you out. Yet, you guys are very much appreciated! Yeah! :D
- Location:Home
- Mood: touched
- Music:"Love Song"
Oh my goodness. I am still awake when it is going to be morning soon. Haiz. I am having difficulty getting to sleep recently. Even if i were to wake up very early in the morning, i will still turn in very early in the morning. Wakaka. Somehow, i need to change in this area. I made a mistake of taking a nap at 9pm. When i woke up at 1am, i have difficulty getting to sleep again.
And today i attended the starhub training. Lol! This has got to be one of the toughest job in terms of having to do a lot of homework. When Perry was going through the promotion, somehow i got tempted to get myself a cable tv as well. All these would have to wait when i earn more money. It is a want, not a need.
Is it me or i am getting really old. These 2 days, i have very terrible bad ache. It causes me to have difficulty in walking. I dunno if i did really sprain my back, or is it my bones are getting weaker. I have to drink more milk and pray more specifically. My body is failing me at such a young age.
Oh Lord, i just need to grow more in my character. Teach me how to live again. I am sowing on this DMD guy. God, i know what i need. I pray it is according to Your will! Ok, i shall not demand, let Your will be done. Fasting and praying again! Soften, soften, soften the land of DMD! Let the artist's heart be soften! I need to run commercials so that more non believers will be attracted! Pray, pray and pray for more artists to come and know You! Give, give and give us the abilities to identify with how an artist thinks! Create, create and create the need for him to come and believe in you! Convict, convict & convict his heart that You're the only way to salvation!
On saturday, i was having a difficult time focusing. It was due to things that happen on that day itself. I was very affected by someone's action. It wasn't really his fault. The Holy Spirit spoke to me so specifically that night when i was praying.
"Why are you affected? Are you building your own kingdom? "
I repented. Instantaneously, i wasn't affected by it anymore. It is just a one time failure that affected me so much, i wonder to myself how much i have hurt God every time i fail. I come in terms fully that everyone takes time to grow. Why do i need to be so affected?! God will take care of His flock. I am so sure.
Haha. Surprisingly, even a person like me who don't really think i am a natural leader sins in the area of "taking things into my own hands when taking care of my group" as well. It really teaches me this lesson, no matter who am i, what kind of person i was, i wasn't above temptation. The devil is tricky. He manipulates, schemes and calculates well. If that area of my life is unchecked, i could have fallen because of it.
Forgive me, my Lord. Your servant is ignorant. Teach me how to live again.
No matter how successful my ministry is, it is to glorify Your name, i am still Your child. Let no pride reigns in my heart. I need to learn to be humble and modest. I don't know much. Reveal Yourself to me. I am waiting.
Leadership camp is coming! Do i look forward to it? Erm, yes and no. Yes because i can learn and help others who are younger. No because it is not a mega boost. Your daily life still counts.
"Walking with God daily far surpasses any camp & conference you can attend with your whole life". That being true, it is still important to fellowship, learn from one another in this camp. There are certain level of excitement growing in me to see PolyDins having new leaders who rise up to God's calling. You're a new generation!
Character is still the key. Teach them how to live again.
Sounds emotional.... Lol. Never say die.
2 Peter 1:10-11 (New International Version)
10Therefore, my brothers, be all the more eager to make your calling and election sure. For if you do these things, you will never fall, 11and you will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
- Location:Home
- Mood:determined
- Music:"It is not over" by Chris Daughtry
Word Twister Adventure! The current tvb drama i am watching. It is hilarious! I absolutely love the chemistry between Jordan Chan and Charmaine Sheh! I simply adore their acting as well as the storyline. I have to give props to Kara Hui too! I never knew she can act in comical drama too. The cast isn't too big, neither is the plot complicated. It is not a must watch series, but having such tv program for entertainment can add much amusement to a hectic life!
God is so much to be praised this week! After a long haul of job searching for these past 2 weeks, finally i am able to get a job at starhub promoting their cable tv, telephone lines etc. The best is that the time is from 4.30-9pm, 4 weekdays and on a sunday! I don't have to work on saturday which i can solely set aside for ministry! I can use the afternoon to impart, and for 1 to 1 discipleship! An added bonus is that it will be very closed to my house! God is great! Proclaim His greatness to the whole world. Woo~Hoo!
I am praying for this guy, Chun Yu from DMD. He has been a responsive guy so far! God, i plead you to soften His heart! He is a DMD student. I need him for the esthetic sense! You know what i mean.
Psalm 102:2
Do not hide your face from me when I am in distress. Turn your ear to me; when I call, answer me quickly.
- Location:Home
- Mood: pleased
- Music:"All I Do" by Hillsongs
Think twice, it is another day for you and me in paradise.
Oh... is it something to do with lovers? No way!
Time in global conference has being a blast! Kudos to Jullian and his wife who shared the church planting experience in Peru, it is fabulous! God is great to them! I am sure i will taste the goodness if i were to be faithful to His calling. Not church planting as yet, but sowing seeds in the campus and my family.
Time tests a person. Am i ready for it? Will i run after God's heart like how i did in Singapore when i am elsewhere? It is a question left to be unanswered. Images flashed across my mind with all the brutal murder, persecutions that are in the land where i am "called".
It is unbelievable to think someone like me had actually contemplated planting a church. I do not know how long will i cling to this vision, how i can be so secure despite being hated by everyone else in the world. As we become God's children, we are hated by the world along with it's practice. As i was praying, the Holy Spirit prompted me, "Am i ready to be hated by men?".
When i wanted to answer this question with much intense emotions in my mind. God relieves it with the community that He has set around me. "I will never walk alone" came at the right time.
John 15:18
[ The World Hates the Disciples ] "If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first.
This word means gold!
2 Corinthians 4:8-12 (New International Version)
8We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 10We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. 11For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. 12So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.
And i will enjoy countless days in paradise with Him.
- Location:NYP Library
- Mood: calm
- Music:"Another Day In Paradize" by Phil Colins
"I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him.
Just to kick things off.
I was back from the UL retreat, refreshed & energetic! It was definitely a great retreat after so long of hard work!
Many things do take place before this retreat. I shall have the important ones posted up.
On saturday, it was the first time i went to LAN with my guys. I am telling you, i realized that going LAN is crazy. I absolutely dislike the place. It is so noisy. Initially, i wanted to play Left 4 Dead. I ended up playing counter-strike because some people weren't interested in the game. As a good leader, i agreed to do so :P. Ricwan told me he is so called the "happy meal" for the people. I ended up not being their "happy meal", but their "set meal". In fact, i was upsized! They had their full. Lol!
It will certainly be incredulous if i were to say i have gone to the LAN shop. Having said that, the experience was incredible! I ended up not hating counter strike. However, i didn't love it too much either.
I was preparing to meet my DMM on sunday. When i was just about to get my lazy back off the bed, my sister fainted in the toilet. My mother screamed and it jolted us awake. We tried shaking her conscious, but it was all in vain. I was responsible in calling the ambulance. Now, i want to share one amazing fact.
Amazing fact: When you call the ambulance, they can track your address by simply having your telephone number. They will only ask your block address to see if their data is correct or up to date. Then they will read out your whole address, & you just simply have to answer them, "That is right".
My sister was sent to NUH. Sadly, i wasn't able to go for my DMM. I called Wei Koon 15 minutes before the meeting starts to inform him to chair the meeting. He must have been blown away, having to be called last minute to hold it. I guess, that was God's plan. NYPA can survive without me, i am so sure. I believe to my soul he can even do so much better than me. The generation has got to be moving! Thanks Wei Koon for your obedience as well as your faith in believing you can.
I had a great conversation with my mother. She asks me what is my future plan. Why i always hold meeting? I explain to her the importance of building the young generation strong, not to be so emotional & aimless. She couldn't understand why am i investing in people's lives. I pray silently she would come to know God one day, so that she will know my burden & heartbeat. She didn't disagree, but she couldn't understand. I could perfectly understand this, if i were to be in the world today, i wouldn't have understood.
I went for the UL retreat. The 1st day is interesting.
We head to Bukit Timah hawker center for dinner. Good Lord, the food there is yummy yummy. I just can't have enough of it. All along, i thought Singapore only has 1 food up to standard, "Maxwell road chicken rice". It did broaden my horizon. I had the beancurd with riceballs. Oh my goodness! The beancurd is definitely the best i've yet! It is so sweet & smooth. The sea coconut that Jen bought was extremely tasty. Wow!
National day parade was a blast! Initially, i almost fell asleep. I told Andrew that i have never been interested in watching NDP. It changed my mind after the marching was over, everything was done so nicely with all the multimedia, lighting, child like animation & drawing, mini screens like windows. One word to describe it, "MAGNIFICENT"!
I watched Faith like Potato. Oh Gosh! I am truly inspired by this farmer's life! It was adapted from a real life story. This guy started out being very emotional & unstable, always getting stressed by simple things around him. I didn't really watch the beginning as i took the time to go for a bath. But, i watched the second half of the show with much anticipation & excitement! He became a christian & he had a desire to know God even more. There was an event which took place where his farm is burnt down by a raging fire! They asked for help & tried to get rid of the fire. It didn't work. When he told his friends to pray for rain, his friend reminded him that this wasn't a season for rain. Out of his desperation, he cried out loud FOR RAIN! God meets needs! The sky is then overcast with dark clouds & it rained heavily. The fire is put out with much ease. Wow! Shouldn't spoil the show any further or it wouldn't be good for the people watching the show. I intended to play it in one of the outing during the holidays.
Bill Hybes speech is amazing! We don't just have a vision, we got to own it! This statement stuck in my head!
Thus, with faith, Alpha 30 end of 2009. Perfect 2010. It was dropped in my heart when i prayed for next year not long ago. I will elaborate more next year. Haha
Classical moments took place when we played monopoly on the last day.
Classic 1: Jasmine on her first turn was the first person to throw a card. She threw a "it's my birthday" card. (This card is supposed to collect 2million from everybody). However, as she was the first one to play, nobody has any money to give her! Lol! Astonishingly, there is one game she almost have a "it's my birthday" card every turn. She then addressed it as her favorite card.
Classic 2: On my first turn (I wonder why is it always on the first turn we made stupid mistakes, seriously), i threw a card "GO" (This card can allow you to collect an additional 2 cards, along with the 2 cards you will take every turn) before i even take my 2 cards. Arh! Horrible mistake!
Classic 3: Mei Hwa on her turn straight away put 3 property in her deck thinking it was just 1 turn. (1 card is 1 turn). She ended up having lost the turn & have her whole set of property being vulnerable to the "Deal Breaker" attack.
Classic 4: It didn't happen to our side. Li Yan uses the "Deal Breaker" card to steal a property.
Sure fun, i guess. I learn one thing. "Losing with a lot of money" is somewhat a dignity. Haha.
- Location:Atomic Gaming PTE LTD
- Mood: chipper
- Music:All The Time
I had liked to address some of the things that i encountered these few days. I was watching rosy business & all i wanted to say is, "Sheren Tang got to win the best actress award this year"! I have being a big fan of hers since "war & beauty". I have watched almost all of her shows, & adore the characters she portrayed in "La Femme Desperado" & "The Family Link". Her acting in the recent hit show, "Rosy Business" is out of the world, beyond all vocabulary to describe. I love her interaction with Susan Tse. I have got to say i became Susan Tse big fan as well! Haha. Talking about the both of them, the both of them are actually christians. Can christians really act? Anyway, Susan Tse's role is a bad one, but it doesn't mean that christ followers can't act evil. With Christ, all things are possible.
Here are some of the screenshots:
Nice. Do catch the show.
Saturday was a good day, with a good sermon preached by Jasmine. I will never forget what is "shiok" time. The praise & worship wasn't the best, but i can say it was a valiant effort by Jeremy especially when he was told last minute to lead. I would have freaked out if i were him as well. Well, this week, i finally had a breakthrough! Praise the Lord i finally picked up the courage to speak the word that was prompted by the Holy Spirit to speak to the group. I was struggling back at the place where i stood, pondering over & over again whether i should speak the word. Excuses played in my mind throughout the whole worship session, "how would the others look at me?" , "maybe not this time?", "is it confirmed that it is the Holy Spirit?". I tried to give myself the best excuses i could find only to be answered by the Holy Spirit, "Yes, it is now". Nonetheless, i had one last trump card i had, "next week i will be service leading, maybe i can ask liyan to help speak the word that i have". Fear totally gripped my heart, i wasn't able to step out of courage. The worship lyrics resounded in my mind so clearly with these few words, "I overcome with the blood of the lamb". That was God's answer to my fear, we are victors in Christ Jesus who has overcome everything! I just knew that i had to speak it out now!
I was a subject to fear in the past, finally i am able to have a breakthrough in this area. I was scared, but i thank God i have taken the first step to speak in service. I am unsure if it helps the people out there, but one thing i am clear of, i am so certain that God is going to work so greatly in my life! Amen & amen!
We celebrated Guan Quan 21st birthday on saturday! Happy birthday! To think i have known him for 3 years already. Many things have really taken place in his life. I received feedback about myself & about the group. Praise the Lord! I have been praying for it so much these days. I am so sure the quality of the group needs to come in before the quanity can come. Recently, many fear to feedback to me because i have that kind of "spiritual" stance that they are inferior to. Plus, those who are not scared made comments out of a subjective & defensive mind, which didn't help in many cases. This time, i had a great chat with this brother, who shared a great deal of things to me objectively & how to help the group to grow! Thank you Sye Kit, you've helped me with much!!! I needed it so much! Yeah! :D
It has been a great celebration, i am seeing many people start to change & grow, initiating to affirm even more than last time. People don't just do their own things during birthday celebration, but they listen, which is a new thing & a great one. When quality comes, quantity comes, NYPA break 30!
Oh, another good news. Xiao Yuan, a new believer who came to know God just 1 week ago, is a very spiritually hungry man! On saturday, after i smsed him a verse, he read it immediately. On sunday, when i talk to him again, he reminded me of what was spoken in the word. Lol! That is not all. As a young believer, he didn't know much, he didn't know why believers read the bible, what is praise & worship exactly, what is & what's not a sin. But, he did it out of obedience when his follow upper told him that he can know much more about God when he reads the bible. He has a very sincere desire to read God's words, to praise & worship Him. God, i pray for your protection to be on Him. Yeah! Holy Spirit, do Your work & help Him to grow!
Just a bad news amidst of all the good news, today my i have a stomachache in the morning while i am on the train. I had to go to the toilet at toa payoh station, wasted $8 for a cab in order not to be late! Drop my 50 cents on my way up the platform! Arh! Was a bit negative, but God i plead my case that you will not allow it a 2nd time, thank You in advance. I wasted $8 just for going to the toilet. Haha. Not that i am dumb, but i was joyful for God still lives!
Psalms 40:11
11 Do not withhold your mercy from me, O LORD;
may your love and your truth always protect me.
I want to write an exposition of a text, but i didn't want to lengthen the post, next time then.
Tata.
- Location:Atomic Gaming Innovation P/L
- Mood: jubilant
- Music:"You're my all in all"
Since i have not updated for quite some time, i shall use this as a starting point...
20 things about me
1. I am born in 1988, born again in 2005
2. My mother is my world idol.
3. Jesus, American idol, amazing race, tvb drama are the essence of my life
4. My favorite book is the bible. My favorite verse is 2 corinthians 5:7. "We live by faith & not by sight"
5. I do not like to be in any relationship. Dislike the responsibilities & the burden.
6. I like to blend into the wall. Unnecessary attention is a no-no for me.
7. Leadership is never a want for me, it is always a need.
8. I think of my sheeps everyday
9. I have a star as my buddy, a snow lotus as my accomplice
10. I like evil characters who scheme in tv drama
11. I don't like chinese songs.
12. I have a supervisor who finds my shepherd pretty. =x
13. I believe vision challenges a person, character sustains a person, goal pushes a person to achieve greater things in life
14. I am lazy to dress up.
15. I hated the fact that Clay Aiken & David Archuleta did not win their season of American Idol
16. I am someone who likes monotonous stuff & follow instructions blindly
17. Ipod is a need in my life
18. I am always challenged after Jasmine speaks.
19. I tend to forget my keys & money when i go out.
20. Panadol is my best friend on sunday.
Yeah. I am sure after this, you will know me better :D
- Location:Home
- Mood: contemplative
- Music:"Mad World"
It is week 7 of my attachment. I was sick the past 2 days due to the sickness being spread by my brother. I am still coughing pretty badly right now. H1N1? No way! Haha. I am under God's protection.
Happy 18th birthday to Wei Kang, 22nd birthday to Leslie. Both of you are someone important in my life! I want to say let's run to the end of the race together, witnessing many people crossing the line of faith as we persevere in sharing the gospel to people despite oppositions, rejections etc.
One thanksgiving to God -> Kai En (A brother from RP) sms-ed me yesterday, asking if i have lost a guitar. It took me aback, because it has been so long that i've received absolutely no news about it for months! I was telling Wei Kang that i would need to pay back Guan Quan for the loss of the guitar. I made a quick prayer stating that i will be able to find it (I didn't make the prayer seriously because i have already set my heart in paying him already). After caregroup, as i was heading out of school, i received the sms from him. God is absolutely great! He hears me!
Today, as i was reading the book of Ezra, God spoke to me about setting our hearts right for ministry. Ezra was broken hearted, not because he lost his loved ones, but because his fellow countrymen have forsaken the Lord, disobeyed Him. The exiles didn't come to repentance despite having to go through torments, sufferings & being under the bondage of the babylonians. They intermarry, got themselves wives who are non God followers. Ezra mourned & grieved, proclaimed a fast throughout the entire nation to repent. I have a level of burden in my heart, i asked God if i am leading my people to repentance. Does ministry matter so much more than the heart/attitude/character? As i was questioning, i answered it long ago. The Holy Spirit is prompting me, i sure can tell. It is not an answer i am seeking for, it's a reminder that i need to be aware of.
Ezra 10:5-6 (New International Version)
5 So Ezra rose up and put the leading priests and Levites and all Israel under oath to do what had been suggested. And they took the oath. 6 Then Ezra withdrew from before the house of God and went to the room of Jehohanan son of Eliashib. While he was there, he ate no food and drank no water, because he continued to mourn over the unfaithfulness of the exiles.
God! Help me to be a good leader who take care of myself well. Someone who mourn over the lost, & the believers alike. I make it my prayer to you all days
- Location:Atomic Gaming Innovation Pte Ltd
- Mood: grieved
- Music:This is it by "Melba Moore"
It was a fiery teaching by Jasmine. Well, i can now clearly know why many people think she is "hardcore". I wasn't failed to be challenged whenever she spoke to us. It made a great impact in my heart. After it, it is always about, "Yes, i should go out there to do something!". It speaks about Holy Spirit empowered leadership. I clearly recognises the power of the Holy Spirit in God's ministry. It is just so important for the power of the Holy Spirit to move in our caregroups.
Mark 13:11
Whenever you are arrested and brought to trial, do not worry beforehand about what to say. Just say whatever is given you at the time, for it is not you speaking, but the Holy Spirit.
Mark clearly tells us that the Holy Spirit will speak up for us. He will help us to do, speak what we think we can't with our own abilities. When we are testifying or witnessing, we shouldn't be too worried if our speech will be able to touch non believers life, for if it is really the Holy Spirit that is at work in us, the Holy Spirit will be able to convict the hearts of the people through us! We shouldn't plan to such an extent that we become so rigid that if the Holy Spirit prompts us to change it up, we are unwilling to listen to Him, which eventually will lead to disobedience.
I have to rush for meeting. LOL!
John 14:26
But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.
No time to write. I will continue with it.
Holy Spirit, touch me from above
Holy Spirit, fill me with your love
Holy Spirit, move upon my life
Holy Spirit, stirs me inside
And i yield to You, Spirit of the Lord
Do Your work in me!
- Location:Home
- Mood: rejuvenated
- Music:"Holy Spirit"
Me: I have no idea. It has been quite a road, i guess.
Blog: I am interested to find out more about your life. What has indeed happened?
Me: What a dull way to do an interview! It is not the way to do it!
Blog: Alright, i know you love AI. Have you been keeping up with it?
Me: That is more like it! Allison is signed to Jive, the same company that signs David Archuleta. I am so excited!
Blog: Woah. Just calm down. What is it like in church? Some things happen?
Me: Yeah! Definitely much has happened! Firstly, i want to thank God that Li Ming come to know God on the 13th. Saturday the 13th will mean much more than Friday the 13th.
Blog: That is superb. I hope i can worship a heavenly Father like Him as well.
Me: ..... If you can have a soul
Blog: This is pathetic. Anyway, can you share to me more of what is happening around in church?
Me: Last week, we have a freedom disorder service. The drama is brilliant! Many props to the production team who comes up with the creative concept of using sounds, music to deliver a message. Terence's testimony is great! It touches my heart.
Blog: Oh.. Anybody crossed the line of salvation that day?
Me: Sadly, no. However, Jasmine has spoken to us about it and had made a great impact. I am sure more to come. I just have my hopes are high because God is higher than all hopes. :D
Blog: Sounds confident.
Me: That is right!
Blog: What else did you do?
Me: That is pretty impolite. Anyways, i will entertain this question because i have much to share. Nyp has a tueday night fever! The drama was astonishing. We have a wide range of content, from Hokkien to Sadako etc. Personally, i was impressed with Kai Sze & Celestine's acting. Suherman's acting skills weren't too shabby. We've got such natural talents here!
Blog: More?
Me: I slept in the night. I am too tired. Woke up at 5am and have mahjong sessions with Sye Kit, Wei Kang, Stephen, Vincent & Hong Siong. I won 3 rounds in a row! Awesome right?
Blog: Sure that is. How about your attachment? Getting tougher?
Me: Certainly, i have to deal with character rigging due next thursday. My head is surely getting big.
Blog: Alright! Family life.
Me: Wow. So much is going on right now. I have heart issues. Too much KFC. Oh, i just had it! Oh my goodness! My brother just came back from 2 weeks of NS. Nice to see him with a shaved head.
Blog: Eh...
Me: Before you continue interviewing me.... My break has just ended. Back to rigging the flower! So pathetic!
Blog: Ok, enjoy yourself!
Me: You too! I will blast a music for you! "I shot the sheriff man" by Bob Marley. You will sure enjoy it!
Blog: Sure! Thanks a lot!
Me: Regards, Alpha 30!
I Shot The Sheriff Man - Bob Marley
(I shot the sheriff
But I didn't shoot no deputy, oh no! Oh!
I shot the sheriff
But I didn't shoot no deputy, ooh, ooh, oo-ooh.)
Yeah! All around in my home town,
They're tryin' to track me down;
They say they want to bring me in guilty
For the killing of a deputy,
For the life of a deputy.
But I say:
Oh, now, now. Oh!
(I shot the sheriff.) - the sheriff.
(But I swear it was in selfdefence.)
Oh, no! (Ooh, ooh, oo-oh) Yeah!
I say: I shot the sheriff - Oh, Lord! -
(And they say it is a capital offence.)
Yeah! (Ooh, ooh, oo-oh) Yeah!
Sheriff John Brown always hated me,
For what, I don't know:
Every time I plant a seed,
He said kill it before it grow -
He said kill them before they grow.
And so:
Read it in the news:
(I shot the sheriff.) Oh, Lord!
(But I swear it was in self-defence.)
Where was the deputy? (Oo-oo-oh)
I say: I shot the sheriff,
But I swear it was in selfdefence. (Oo-oh) Yeah!
Freedom came my way one day
And I started out of town, yeah!
All of a sudden I saw sheriff John Brown
Aiming to shoot me down,
So I shot - I shot - I shot him down and I say:
If I am guilty I will pay.
(I shot the sheriff,)
But I say (But I didn't shoot no deputy),
I didn't shoot no deputy (oh, no-oh), oh no!
(I shot the sheriff.) I did!
But I didn't shoot no deputy. Oh! (Oo-oo-ooh)
Reflexes had got the better of me
And what is to be must be:
Every day the bucket a-go a well,
One day the bottom a-go drop out,
One day the bottom a-go drop out.
I say:
I - I - I - I shot the sheriff.
Lord, I didn't shot the deputy. Yeah!
I - I (shot the sheriff) -
But I didn't shoot no deputy, yeah! No, yeah!
- Location:Atomic Gaming Innovation Pte Ltd
- Mood: contemplative
- Music:"I Shot The Sheriff Man" by Bob Marley
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